Late Night Creature Feature
by cynicalshadows
Summary: Lots of things can test the bonds of friendship. Going to the movies shouldn't be one of them. Kara and Lee. Pre-miniseries.


"Come on," Kara says, leading the way into the darkened theatre and immediately making a beeline towards the first row.

"Wait!" Lee hisses, trying to keep his voice down since the previews had already started. "I'm not sitting in the front."

Kara stops, turning back to him and if there was enough light to actually see her expression clearly, he knows he would find her glaring. "What? Why the frak not? Those are the best seats."

"I don't like having to crane my head up to see the screen," he explains. "Can't we sit somewhere else?"

"Fine. Gods forbid the almighty Apollo gets a crick in his neck," she sighs.

Without another word, Lee steps into the nearest empty row but halts when Kara's fingers clutch his shoulder with enough force for him almost to drop his popcorn. "We're not sitting there!" she says, almost like she is offended at the possibility. "There are only two places worth sitting when you're at the movies and that's the very front or the very back, and since you can't _handle_ the front…" She makes a disgusted noise and starts up the aisle, leaving Lee no choice but to follow her.

No sooner do they sit down however than Kara is ordering him back onto his feet. "Get up!"

"What?" Lee stammers. "I thought you wanted to sit in the back?"

"No, I _wanted_ to sit in the front, but since you won't, I'm compromising," she says. "So I need you to shift over a chair. I miscounted."

"Miscounted what?"

"The exact middle is fourteen seats from the aisle. I went one too far." She looks at him expectantly. "Scoot over."

"Are you serious?"

"Do I look like I'm kidding Lee? Move!"

"Sheesh," he mutters under his breath as he scoots over a seat. "And people say I'm anal."

"You're lucky I'm in a good mood, or I wouldn't let that slide."

He's about to toss back a retort, some comment along the lines of 'you have good moods?' but thinks better of it when some guy several rows ahead of them makes a shushing noise as the opening credits of the movie start rolling.

It's halfway through the first scene, a senseless jumble of bullets and blood and bizarre morphing monsters made even more chaotic by shaky camera work, when Kara suddenly bends over at the waist. He glances at her in concern, but within seconds she rights herself with a grin on her face and a can of Virgon Brew in her hand.

"Where did you get that?"

"I hid a couple in the pockets of my cargos," she explains, nudging his leg with her own and letting him feel the press of another can against his thigh. "You want it?"

"I cannot believe you smuggled alcohol in here," he says, his voice radiating disapproval.

She exhales, a long exasperated sound. "How else did you expect me to cure my thirst during the flick Lee? It's not like they sell beer at the concession stand."

"You could have bought a soda like a normal person."

"Please," she scoffs, cracking open the can and causing Lee to wince over how loud and unmistakable the noise is in the darkened theatre. "I already spent ten cubits to get the ticket," she continues. "I'm not paying another five for a drink that won't even give me a buzz. That's a total waste of funds."

"Well it's going to be even more of a waste if we get kicked out of here because an usher sees you with that!"

"Relax, Apollo. You think the employees don't know that stuff gets smuggled in all the time?" Kara says, her expression condescending. "Trust me, they know and they don't give a crap. They're teenagers earning minimum wage for frak's sake. They'd most likely encourage audiences to stick it to their boss if it wouldn't get them fired. Besides, even the brown noses are probably less concerned about smuggled in snacks than they are about people getting off in the back row because they have to clean the seats."

Lee nearly chokes. "People getting off in - "

"Shhh!" the man several rows up goes again, shooting what is undoubtedly a nasty look over their direction.

"Yeah Leland, keep it down," Kara jokes, elbowing him in the side and helping herself to his popcorn.

"Hey," he grumbles softly. "I thought you said you didn't want snacks because they were a waste of money!"

"I said I didn't want to _pay_ for them, not that I wouldn't eat them." Then she punctuates her statement with a wink, grabs another fistful of popcorn, and returns her attention to the movie.

Lee does the same. Or at least he tries to, but twenty minutes later he is wondering if it is too late to accept that proffered beer because he is entirely too _sober_ for this movie.

"Gods this is…"

"I know, right! It's awesome."

He cranes his neck to peer at her. "Actually the word I was going to use was atrocious."

"What?" she says in disbelief. "You've got to be kidding. This is great."

"Great? Kara, it's nothing but… explosions and sex and gore."

She nods. "Yeah, exactly!"

"It doesn't even have a plot."

"Sure it does. That one chick is like a bounty hunter or a pirate or something and she's trying to kill all the what-cha-call-its."

"What-cha-call-its?" he repeats doubtfully. "You mean the furry space lizards?"

She tears her eyes away from the film long enough to glower at him. "Lizards? What movie are you watching Lee? Obviously, they are fish."

"That?" he says, indicating the screen where one of the hulking beasts was currently glowering at the camera with decidedly reptilian eyes. "You call _that_ a fish?" As if to prove his point, a forked tongue emerges from the creature's mouth, eliciting a gasp from the audience.

"Yeah, well… they're aliens, so what does it matter!" she huffs, snatching a handful of popcorn and chewing it noisily.

Lee just sits there smirking silently to himself and trying to refrain from making snide remarks about the awful special effects and acting in this film**,** since she seemed to be enjoying it. His mind wanders back to a comment Kara had made earlier and he can't leave well enough alone.

"You weren't serious before about people getting off in the theatre, were you?"

"What?" she teases, flashing him a wicked grin. "Like you've never gotten head in the back row?" He knows he's supposed to laugh, or nod, or something, but he wavers in his decision a fraction too long and Kara blinks in shock. "Oh my gods Lee! How the frak did you get out of high school without getting a blow job at the movies?"

Instantly he is on the defensive. "I… It just never came up, okay?" She snickers at his choice of phrasing and he scowls, amending, "The girls I dated weren't… adventurous like that."

"Since when is going down on someone adventurous?" Kara snorts, then a thought occurs to her and she looks at Lee with something akin to horror. "You _have_ had a blow job before, right?"

He feels blood blazing in his cheeks and is thankful that the dimness of the lighting prevents Kara from seeing him flush. "I don't see how that's any of your - "

She interrupts him, throwing her head back to cackle. "You haven't! Oh lords, Lee Adama hasn't gotten a - "

"Frak, Kara. Keep your voice down," he grinds out. "And yes, for your information, I have had a blow job. Just not in public. Now can we drop this? Or do you want to keep broadcasting about my sex life because I'm not sure the people in the front row heard you!"

She ignores his comments to cover her mouth with her hand, attempting to smother her giggles. It takes a while, but eventually she manages to get her laughter under control. "Oh thank the gods!" she breathes, amusement coloring her tone. "For a moment there I was worried you really were that pathetic."

The casual remark stings more than it ought to, and his chest unexpectedly tightens. "Nice to know you think so highly of me."

"Hey, I didn't say I thought you were _completely_ pathetic," Kara replies. "Just _mostly_ pathetic."

He swallows past the lump in his throat. "Actually I believe the word you used was 'that.'"

She arches a brow at him. "Huh?"

"You said you were worried I was 'that pathetic.'"

She frowns in annoyance. "Who cares what word I used? It doesn't frakking matter."

"It matters to me."

The sentence is out before he can censor himself, and something about the way he says it draws her gaze. "Hey," she says, dropping a hand onto his knee and squeezing it gently. "I was only messing around. You know that right?"

He sucks in a breath of air, looks at her fingers upon his leg, sees the silver band resting there, and reminds himself that she is and always will be Zak's. "I know."

She gives him a hesitant smile. "Are we okay?"

"Yeah, we're okay."

"Good, 'cause I don't _actually_ think you're pathetic, although you do need to get a blow job at the theatre sometime."

He shouldn't say it, not when she's engaged to his brother, but the opening is just too good to resist. "You offering?"

She's silent for a moment, and then she bursts into peals of infectious laughter, and Lee joins her, laughing so hard his sides hurt**,** as all tension between them dissipates and he is just so frakking _glad_ to have her in his life in any capacity at all.

A guy's voice comes out of the darkness at them. "Shh! Keep it down!"

"Shh yourself!" Kara snaps back. She picks up a kernel from the tub in Lee's lap and flicks it at the back of the head of the man who'd spoken.

"Kara!" Lee gasps, relief washing over him a second later when the impromptu projectile falls short of its target. The relief is short lived however, because before he can stop her, Kara selects another piece, aims, and sends it flying.

"Damn," she mutters as it too misses. "Not enough weight."

"Good," Lee chides, moving the popcorn to his other side just in case she decides to try again.

He needn't have bothered, however, because rather than reaching for the popcorn, Kara's fingers slide into the pocket of her cargo pants and emerge with a bag of gummy bears. She tears open the package, and Lee fears for a moment that she is going to chuck one of the candies at the man's head, but instead she pops a few into her mouth and offers him the bag.

"No thanks," he whispers, waving them off and she shrugs as if to say 'suit yourself' before nonchalantly spitting one of the now sticky gummies into her palm and launching it at outline of the asshole who'd had the audacity to shush them.

This time, she makes contact.

"What the hell!" a male voice rings out, and Lee sits there with growing horror as the man lifts his arm to touch the back of his head and discovers a piece of candy stuck in his hair. Slowly, he rises to his feet, and seeing how frakking huge the guy is, Lee recognizes that they are in deep shit.

Kara evidently realizes the same thing because before he knows what is happening, she grabs his wrist and is wrenching him to his feet. "Run!"

He doesn't need to be told twice.

Together they sprint towards the exit, Kara squealing the whole time like she actually _enjoys_ this, even as the echoes of footsteps follow them out into the parking lot and they have to weave and duck behind vehicles.

"I can't believe you did that!" Lee whispers as they crouch behind a car avoiding their pursuer.

"You're just upset I did it first."

"Am not! I never would have done something like that."

"Yeah, but I bet you wanted to."

"You are beyond insane!"

"Flattery will get you everywhere Apollo. Coast clear?"

He peeks out from behind the bumper. "Looks like."

"Make a dash for my truck on three?"

"Count it down, Starbuck."

"One, two, three."

They spring forward, running full out for the truck.

"I am never going to the movies with you again!" Lee pants once they scramble inside and Kara thrusts the keys in the ignition.

"See if I ever go to the movies with _you_ again either," she declares gunning the engine. "I've had more fun in hack!"

"Well if you think watching some shoddy alien space werewolf movie with _you_ is my idea of a good time, you've got another thing coming!"

"Frak you!" she spits, shifting the truck into gear and driving off fast enough that the tires screech in protest.

They drive in absolute silence for several minutes, and then Lee glances at Kara from the corner of his eye. "So… same time next week?"

She grins. "Definitely."


End file.
